RNN • RABIYA NEWS NETWORK100% unreliable
Breaking News
Developing: woman found in Bangalore with 0% memory but 100% Instagram game • Pigeon witness refuses comment • Chai declared “person of interest” • Rabiya News Network: 100% unreliable • Developing: woman found in Bangalore with 0% memory but 100% Instagram game • Pigeon witness refuses comment • Chai declared “person of interest” • Rabiya News Network: 100% unreliable •
Found in Bangalore: Rabiya
Mystery solved: Rabiya found in Bangalore with 0% memory
She remembers her name, her Instagram password, and exactly nothing else. Bangalore is stunned. Rabiya is also stunned.
Exclusive evidence
Bangalore, allegedlyCase #WHO-AM-I
Highly scientific findings
Memory recovery report
Remembering her name100%
Remembering why she's in Bangalore2%
Remembering yesterday0%
Remembering embarrassing momentsmysteriously 87%
Remembering where she parked her memories404%
Finding her way homeloading…
Additional totally serious evidence
Vital intelligence
- •Still remembers every Instagram password she's ever had.
- •Asked a pigeon for directions. Pigeon was unhelpful.
- •Tried to unlock a memory with face ID. It laughed.
- •Currently ranking #1 on Bangalore's “Most Likely to Forget Why She Walked Into a Room” list.
- •Her Google Maps history just says “???”.
The nation demands answers*
If you recognize this girl…
Please remain calm. Do not alert the authorities. She mostly needs context and maybe another chai.
*No nation was consulted for this report. No pigeons were harmed.